it felt forever but my xanga blood kept reminding me to go check, if the feeling of posting an entry has left me, at least a month. its been the usual office/home experience that consumes me. sometimes i end up finding myself alone in bed and getting ready to sleep. is this what you call loneliness? boredom perhaps? maybe, laziness?

fighting that unidentified emotion as i promised myself to limit from posting negative stuff because that reflects what my life has been. i don't wanna go back and reread everything only to realize that i've been sad at this point.

anyway, so here i am again. hope i can go as often as possible. i'll try monthly. if not, buzz me or something.

just last weekend i had been with choir friends to enjoy fireworks as china and netherlands compete for the annual pyro musical held here in the philippines. just imagine for almost an hour, you'll see fireworks from these countries light the skies telling a story or a interpretation of any music they choose. i did here something about timing of the fireworks. of the two, i admitted that i like netherlands' more coz' china (how amazing the lights were) felt like there's something lacking. don't get me wrong though, theirs was like a love story and the ending firework was really awesome. looked like arrows (white and a red tail) raining down. while on the netherlands part, i really liked the golden firework that lighted the skies. it's so elegant.

i didn't have my camera with me so i just searched youtube (thank you!) for some vids.





cool, huh? it is. there were lots of people clapping their hands and shouting in awe of these performances. the major distraction though would be the restaurants nearby. hehehe. the food smelled so delicious that sometimes i go search where it came from.

i'm not a fan of resolutions nor changing just because. every year i tend to look up for the future but before planning ahead, i look back and say... ahh, what a year it was. 2011 life has been good to me. i've never experienced anything like that. it seemed that it was my lucky year - having been able to travel to places, getting high marks from job well done, choir stuff. and, i assume, if i tried my luck on the lottery, i probably have won something.

i am not sure of 2012 though. will it be like last year's? will i challenge myself to a new level? will it be my time? i don't know.... it's not like i can predict my future.

but sure stuff about me, being the boring guy i am, i'll try enjoy everything as much as i could. be emotional if needed and well, try to be helpful at most to the needy.

for some reason, i'm thinking of staying at home most of the times a lot. home = province and not at the city i work at. i don't feel excited anymore nor i long to be in places. i probably and having serious homesickness. or maybe i'm trying to get rid of something. i think of establishing a business of my own (probably get a franchise and sell stuff at the mall/market) and just be here. doing boring stuff - watching tv, lazy day if i want to, sleep more times than needed... just like that. it's not really about missing people here but more of being at home.

i sometimes think, i should have just enrolled some education units and become a teacher here - part time. and sell something after and not stay in the office till i get an award for staying late and doing more than what a usual employee should do.

i mean, my load in the office is not full, it's just that.... i feel tired.

speaking of breaks, december for me is like an investment of leaves. i don't usually take a break on earlier months nor i find a reason to be out of the office other than being at home or just plain sick. and since travelling back during this time is like a game in survivor where he who gets the seat first gets to go home early, i make sure to remind my boss that it would take a lot of effort on my part if i am not allowed for a day off before the holidays officially start. i am thankful that he understands. anyway, by the time i get home, party after party was experienced. i'm stuffed till tomorrow is the best explanation.

of course, there's always the choir stuff. i was asked to teach the oldest group in the church some new songs. would you believe that? imagine your and your son's/daughter's music and english teachers looking at you and waiting for your instructions. i am humbled. it didn't come without something as i was surprised upon learning that after christmas, the kids have received a cheque for their amplifier. someone gave it to them as a gift. like wow! i think of uniforms but better sound system is better.

and here's something from their christmas party.. at the beach.





how about the party at home? well....







btw, the christmas tree over there. i did that. my mom didn't want a tree this season just because, quoting her, santa doesn't visit anymore. i was like, whoa! is this for real? so i did it. the tree, the balls, the lights, the flowers everything. i got all the stuff from the box they kept and just selected those that are red or white. my friend said, it's the color of the year. after, turning the lights on, she went near and hang the red stockings. wishing that santa would fill them up.

ha! it may be a late greeting but happy new year everyone!